Oh dear. I’m about to admit something and I’m not really sure I should as I know I’ll probably get called a hypocrite. But oh well…here goes nothing.
I am a vegetarian and I’ve been so for about the last two years. It wasn’t because I did it for animal welfare (although I do love animals and I am a huge supporter of animal protests.) I am physically unable to digest one of the enzymes in meat, so I eschew it and every other animal flesh or product. This week I had my boyfriend over for the week, so that’s why I’ve been a little quiet on the blogging front. For the entire week, we ate Quorn products like fake chicken and fake bacon- and honestly, I didn’t feel like I actually missed meat that much. I made dishes like Quorn Chicken Korma and Cheese and Broccoli Quorn Chicken Escalopes. And frankly, I out did myself. I was really proud of the fact that I actually realized I could actually cook.
So I was being a good vegetarian, getting my protein and eat my vegetables while trying to stay away from the junk food. (I made Peanut Butter Cookies yesterday, and I’ve eaten way too many to count, oh and I just sat down and ate a whole cheese pizza…I guess that’s my couple of weak spots for the month but I won’t beat myself up about it. Everyone has them, it’s part of living and not being a slave to food.) Then the boyfriend went home today, which was hard to let him go after living with him for a week…and I’ve kinda hit a rough patch. I feel like a bad drug addict getting caught by the police or a dieter with their hand in the cookie jar- I got home hungry and ate a ham sandwich. You know the kind of hunger that makes you put your head in the fridge and emerge from it with a peanut butter and chili sauce sandwich. Like pregnancy hunger (been there, done that…not fun when you look back at the crazy things you ate) But this wasn’t a Quorn ham sandwich…an actual ham sandwich. You know…a thin slice of pork. Oh god, I feel dirty just talking about it. The way the ham tasted in my mouth, the way it flaked apart when I bit into it. Oh god, oh god…I am such a horrible vegetarian.
Surely I’m just human though? Doesn’t everyone slip up now and again? I mean those on Weight Watchers sometimes find their face in a large slice of chocolate cake at 2am, so why can I not have an accidental slip up with a ham sandwich? I mean, I’m not planning on a pig out session at McDonald’s with eight Big Mac’s or a visit to a Texan barbecue restaurant…it was an ACCIDENT. And a very weak moment, this I will admit. Not planning on quitting the vegetarian diet though as my hair has stopped falling out so much and my skin is a lot clearer these days. Oh and I don’t get the crippling stomach pain from trying to digest meat. I probably will though after that sandwich 😦